So, I'm reading a blog post from the website of Hollywood actress Zooey Deschanel about some experiment designed to make people fall in love with each other. The author admited that the experiment was not all that traditional in it's approach, mostly because it was conducted in a bar instead of a laboratory. So, it's more social than actual science. Okay but, that doesn't necessarily mean the results won't still be interesting, right?
The thing that stuck out the most for me was a line near the end of the post:
"The amazing thing is realizing that the rationalization of love doesn’t take away any of its profundity or sincerity or magic."
Well, no shit? Really?! NEWS FLASH: Romantic feelings tend to act on the
brain in the same way as being high on Cocaine does. Of course, it's
going to feel good! Why would someone bother with it if it didn't feel
good? It certainly does make you do all kinds of strange things you'd never do if you were thinking straight.
Love is not something that can be tested via Scientific
Method. Doing that would take the fun out of it, anyway. And remember,
this is coming from someone who approaches life as nothing but one big mad science experiment. To prove it, I'll list all 36 questions they used in this 'experiment' and answer them right here and now. I promise you that VIRTUALLY NONE of them are likely to be as personal as the experiment claimed...
1.) Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
Probably a lovely woman that I want to seduce and make fall in love with me. Hopefully, I'll have the charm and skill to make it happen. ;)
2.) Would you like to be famous? In what way?
No. I don't want the attention.
3.) Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
Only if it's a professional business call.
4.) What would constitute a perfect day for you?
Kicking back, relaxing and NOT having to do anything related to work or personal business (i.e. paying bills, mowing the lawn, et al.)
5.) When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
I don't remember. It was probably the last time I did Karaoke back in 2011, while I was in the Army serving in Korea.
6.) If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
The mind. Having a great body is useless if you don't have a mind to control it...
7.) Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
No and I'd be very worried about someone who did. They might be suicidal.
8.) Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
I don't have a partner right now so, I'll have to be unusually generic. We're both Human, we're both Adults and we're also both likely to be the same nationality as well.
9.) For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
I don't have an answer for this one. There is a LOT to be grateful for...
10.) If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
Not going to a religious school.
11.) Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
That would take a LOT more than 4 minutes.
12.) If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
Better social skills. Mine have improved immeasurably since I discovered that I had Asperger's Syndrome. However, there's still a long way to go before I can convincingly fake being a Nuerotypical.
13.) If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
Crystal balls can't do that, honey. Trying to see the future is a waste of time anyway. The laws of quantum mechanics (specifically the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle) clearly state that the future can NEVER be predicted.
Even God himself does not know exactly what will happen. He only knows all the different possibilities and which are the most likely to occur. He then prepares for the ones that are most likely and executes the appropriate plan of action. That is how it seems like he knows everything when the laws of the Universe he created prevents that from being 100% factual.
14.) Is there something that you've dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
Yes, and I haven't done it because buying a Corvette requires more money than I have to spend.
15.) What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
So far, I'd say doing so well in college and buying a house.
16.) What do you value most in a friendship?
Loyalty.
17.) What is your most treasured memory?
That's hard to pick.
18.) What is your most terrible memory?
Having a woman I loved tell me that she got impregnated by the idiot she was dating at the time. That was pretty sad...
19.) If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
The future can't be predicted.
20.) What does friendship mean to you?
I don't know how to answer this question.
21.) What roles do love and affection play in your life?
Sadly, not much.
22.) Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
Again, I would need to have a partner first. So, I'll just make something up based on the Ginger of my dreams, and write them in no particular order...
1 - Absolutely intoxicating, all-natural figure
2 - Sweet-natured, (seemingly) bubbly personality
3 - Erudite enough to have a decent conversation with her (That is quite important...)
4 - Beautiful blue eyes
5 - I like how she respects herself enough to NOT give in to any of the pressures put on bikini/lingerie/nude models to do something a bit more risqué...
23.) How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
We were never as close as the families you see on TV shows. No, my childhood was not always happy.
24.) How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
I feel fine about it and I am NOT at all interested in trying to find a wife that reminds me of her. That sounds like a weird form of Oedipus complex to me. Men who seek out women that act like their mothers will invariably start acting like their fathers. And since my parents are now divorced, I feel it's best to NOT emulate their mistakes.
25.) Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "we are both in this room feeling..."
Again, this is something that I can only do if I actually had someone in the room with me.
26.) Complete this sentence "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."
My life? My bed? That question seems a bit generic to me...
27.) If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
I might seem like a Human version of Mr. Spock (or a little nuts) but, I'm not. That's just the way Asperger's affects a person's brain and behavior. I have all the same feelings as anyone else, they're just accessed in different ways.
28.) Tell your partner what you like about them: be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
Answering this question honestly might require me to be less than a gentleman. Can I get away with simply saying that she's the Ginger of my dreams? Can I also say that I want to wife her and give her a half-dozen kids? Because I do... ;)
29.) Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
All 4 years, 9 months and 4 days of my time in the Army. Next Question.
30.) When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
I don't remember.
31.) Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
Well, if the Ginger of my dreams was here, I'd certainly love how downright intoxicating she is... Seriously, that gal makes me drool like a hungry dog eyeballing a steak! She could make me do things I'd ordinarily NEVER do, like go see Romantic Comedies at the movie theater or buy flowers... :P
32.) What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
The horrors of war, maybe? I make jokes about virtually anything since that's how I deal with life's various horrors and outrages. Almost nothing is too sacred.
33.) If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
That question is awfully morbid... And I don't have an answer for it, either. Who goes around thinking about something like that, anyway?
34.) Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
The external HDD's attached to my computers. They contain a record of nearly everything that I own and will be VERY helpful when it comes time to make a claim against my homeowner's policy. The fireproof safe with all the important documents (and my car keys) will have already been liberated from the house earlier, courtesy of a loved one carrying them out with him/her.
35.) Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
Probably one of my younger siblings since they are all young and in good health.
36.) Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
I have no real idea of how to approach people and strike up a conversation with them in a 'seemingly natural' kind of way. Many people have tried to help with this and I have gotten better but, I still have a long way to go. A few pointers would be greatly appreciated.
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There. Now, did any of that tell you anything about me that was really unexpected or new? Almost ALL of it was related to something previously mentioned in past blog posts.
It would be enough to start a few conversations and get to know someone but, I doubt strongly that I would fall in love with someone so quickly after asking them this (or any) series of questions. That is just ridiculous.
- Lord Publius
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