Why the Starship Enterprise is better than the Millenium Falcon

DISCLAIMER: I love both franchises. This was written as a response to a challenge from an old friend. For the purposes of this note, I am referring to Kirk's Enterprise, NCC-1701. You can decide for yourself if you want it to be TOS, TMP or the JJ-Verse version. That particular detail won't really matter.

1.) Neither could even exist according to known physics but, the Enterprise would be a lot closer than the Falcon.

Star Trek's producers actually consulted scientists at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory and the RAND Corporation whereas George Lucas just pulled the Star Wars Universe's physics out of his ass.

2.) Enterprise = Top of the line Starship. Millennium Falcon = Broken down old smuggler's freighter.

3.) When something breaks, the Enterprise has Scotty to work his miracles. The Falcon had Chewie.

As much as I like Chewie, he's definitely NOT an engineer. He couldn't even figure out that he just needed to turn a simple screw to get the hyper-drive working again @ the end of Empire Strikes Back. Good thing R2-D2 knew his shit...

4.) The Falcon runs from enemy vessels most of the time. The Enterprise is the ship all the bad guys are usually running from themselves. Holla!

5.) Jabba the Hut isn't going to have the space slug balls to try and put a price on Captain Kirk's head.

Kirk would use the Enterprise's weapons to VAPORIZE Jabba's palace on Tatooine from orbit. I'm sure both the Rebellion AND the Empire would thank him for helping them to reduce their organized crime problems.

6.) Oh, the Falcon can do 'point five past light speed'? So, you mean Warp 1.5? The Constitution Class Enterprise in its original TOS form does Warp 8.

That's 512 times the speed of light. Just TRY to top that, you Rebel scum! (Of course, both ships really move at 'the Speed of Plot' so, does it really matter?)

7.) The only 'Force' that the Enterprise ever needed was Mass x Acceleration.

And there's no damned midi-chlorians, either. BELIEVABLE MADE-UP PHYSICS FOR THE WIN, BITCHES. :P

8.) And then, there's the Transporters...

The Enterprise can simply beam a photon to a Star Destroyer's bridge and BOOM!!!

Thanks to J. J. Abrams, the Federation might also have Red Matter. One droplet beamed into the Death Star's poorly protected main reactor and, "That's no moon, that's a black hole and a lot of dead Stormtroopers!!!"

9.) Then, there's firepower...

It took the Empire building a movable space station the size of a small moon with a large, very improbable laser to blow up a planet. The Enterprise is only a few hundred meters long and can easily devastate a planet all by itself. If equipped with some Red Matter or a torpedo outfitted with a Trilithium warhead, it can also destroy stars. Star Wars never did that...

Kirk always did have a pretty itchy trigger finger...

10.) Seriously, who'd pick a small beat-up old freighter over the Flagship?



The Enterprise is a lot more comfortable and has many more amenities than the Falcon ever could. Plus, The Enterprise doesn't have to worry about ducking legal authorities on a regular basis.

Looks like the Enterprise wins on all fronts, wannabe Jedi...


- Lord Publius