Khan Lives!

WARNING: This posts contains spoilers about the latest Star Trek film. If you haven't seen it (and don't want the plot spoiled) then, don't read any further.

I'm glad the writers didn't kill off Khan Noonien Singh in Star Trek Into Darkness. He could be quite useful for future stories.

I'm serious.

Say, the Federation faces a genuine existential threat (Klingons & Romulans allying together in a war against the Federation, the Borg, Planet Killers run amok, et al.) and not just something in a Fleet Admiral's mind. Would it not be logical (not to mention dangerous and dramatic) to bring him and his Supermen out of cold storage to face that threat?  73 Augments with 23rd Century weapons could make for a terrifyingly efficient group of warriors.

Also, knowing Khan, he's going to want revenge on Kirk. So, we'll just be wondering throughout the movie when and how he'll go about trying to get that revenge. It could make for a great movie. It certainly did in 1982.

And no, I don't want JJ Abrams to just remake that particular film classic. I simply don't want a character with so much potential to go to waste.

With that being said...

- Lord Publius

About the VMA's last night...

I have several thoughts on this one...

1.) Am I the only one that didn't even know the VMA's were on last night?

2.) Who gives a shit if Miley Cyrus wants to make an ass of herself? We all knew that she'd end up as a trainwreck like every other Disney Princess anyway... (Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears ring any bells?)

3.) Why would MTV have a Video Music Awards when they don't actually play videos or music anymore?

4.) Of all the stupid shit I've seen online in the news about it today (including a few links at the Drudge Report), not a single Rock Star/Group was mentioned. Why not?

5.) The Music Industry has long ago lost any kind of credibility and I'll bet last night's VMA show demonstrated that beyond any doubt. I don't even have to have watched it to know. the fact that everyone is talking about the antics of a no-talent hack/former Disney Princess instead of any kind of music just screams that the business has become an Emperor with no clothes. That's the real reason why album sales have been tanking for years. It's not online piracy or iTunes. It's SHITTY PRODUCT.

- Lord Publius

Why must people underestimate Nintendo?

Sometimes, I think industry analysts are just fanboys that get paid to engage in their unique brand of mental masturbation. Many of them seem to think that the WiiU will be an also-ran like the N64 & GameCube (sadly) were. They thought the same thing with the 3DS and have since been proven wrong. As soon as Nintendo started releasing lots of software for the portable, it started outselling the home consoles.

It looks like History is about to repeat itself in that regard, if the software line-up in this video is any indication. Go ahead, watch it... This blog will still be here when you get done.

Done watching the video? Okay, now we can continue...

So, this is what the fanboys seem to think about the current state of the industry...

And this is what's going to happen when Nintendo starts getting lots of quality software to the WiiU over the remaining months of 2013 and all of 2014...

I've been a gamer for a LONG time now. It started when I was a 2 year-old sitting in front of the TV playing with my mother's old Pong clone, the Magnavox Odyssey 3000. I was in awe. It continued over the next few years with seemingly magical trips to Showbiz Pizza (now known as Chuck E. Cheese) where I got to play Arcade games I still love to this day like Pole Position, SEGA Turbo and Atari's Star Wars game. Then, shit got real when I got the NES for Christmas in 1988...

I was less than 2 weeks away from my 7th birthday at that time. I'm 31 now. I have since amassed a collection of 6 computers (all capable of running at least Windows XP and/or Linux), 48 consoles & portables (including my extra copies of certain systems) and 509 titles spread across these platforms. Since many of those game titles are greatest hits collections, the actual number of games (including all the many duplicates) would be a staggering 1,750.

Of all that, at least half of the titles and systems are from Nintendo. (Another quarter of the collection is easily from Atari.)

I do have a lot of stuff from Nintendo's competitors past and present, and a number of computer games. (Some are even compatible with MacOS & Linux!) I've also gotten rid of a LOT of stuff over the years too.

Some I don't miss... (PS1, Genesis 32X)

Some I can't believe I sold... (Atari 7800, Atari Jaguar)

And some that seemed worthless back then, only to be something I need again now... (The SEGA Game Gear that was originally my younger brother's game machine...)

Various titles aside, I have NEVER sold any of my Nintendo consoles. Except for those 3 original Game Boys that my parents got for me and my 2 younger brothers, I've never sold any of the portables, either. (The 3 different GBA portables I have now will play all of the few remaining Game Boy games I still have.)

So, what's the lesson to be learned here? The cream always rises to the top.

Call them kiddie, the 'Mario Factory' or the 'Walt Disney of game companies' all you want. They are still here when sooooo many of their competitors have either...

1.) Quit making consoles to become 3rd party developers (Atari, SEGA, NEC, Mattel, Bandai)

2.) Been purchased by or merged with other toy/electronic/entertainment companies (Bandai, Atari, Tiger Electronics) or...

3.) Have just disappeared altogether. (Coleco, Epyx, Midway)

Even if they aren't always #1, they are always a strong competitor with 1st party franchises that keep people coming back for more.

That's how they constantly keep coming back like the killer in a series of slasher flicks. That's how they became the 800lb. Gorilla in my game collection. And that is how they will be around for the foreseeable future. No one else has been able to develop as many hit franchises and use them to their advantage.

Don't believe me? Well, then let's look at their major past and present competitors...

SEGA

SEGA had one great 1st party franchise with Sonic the Hedgehog and tried to form others with the Virtua series titles. Too bad that wasn't enough for them since the Nintendo/SEGA rivalry was AWESOME. That's why I dearly miss this company.

It's also too bad that for many years Sonic had some really poorly received titles in his franchise. SEGA's mascot deserved better.I'm also increasingly glad that the games he's getting now are actually worthy of the character.

Who knows? If they had not wasted money on pointless Genesis add-ons, they might have formed more hit franchises and could possibly still be a console maker today. They had a few promising prospects with the Virtua series and a fighting game called Eternal Champions but, they just didn't exploit the opportunities presented.

Atari

Atari relied on ports of their arcade titles (and a few notable 3rd party titles like Space Invaders) for the 'killer apps' on their consoles and computers. (Yes, they made computers for many years as well, including the world's first palm top, the Atari Portfolio. You may have seen it in the movie T2: Judgment Day.)

That approach to software made sense when the industry was started, largely by them. Video Games were seen as the next iteration in arcade amusements, largely supplanting redemption games (Skeeball, Claw games, anything else that might give you tickets) and Pinball. By the time Nintendo came around with the NES and Mario in 1985, that changed forever. Atari didn't change with the times and consequently became less and less relevant.

Like SEGA, I dearly miss them too... :(

Nintendo's current rivals, Sony and Microsoft, have few (if any) 1st party franchises at all.

SONY

Sony has the Ratchet & Clank series, which is an enjoyable bunch of platformers. The PlayStation consoles were also the exclusive home of many popular 3rd party franchises like Crash Bandicoot, Tomb Raider, Final Fantasy and Grand Theft Auto for many years. However, if the 3rd party companies decide to abandon Sony, they are in serious trouble. I have mixed feelings on that since they have been a good foil for Nintendo over the years. They did great in sales with the PS1 & PS2. They stumlbed with the PS3 because of bad marketing and ridiculously high prices. We'll see how it goes with the PS4. I will give it a chance, even if that doesn't necessarily lead to a purchase.

I will say this much for Sony: They were certainly much stronger competitors than Atari and SEGA ever were. Atari was easily brushed aside by the Big N and SEGA could only compete with them in the 16-Bit era with the Genesis. (And that was due mostly to Sonic, sports games that no one remembers and a version of Mortal Kombat that actually had blood.)

MICROSOFT XBOX DIVISION

The only exclusive franchise this company has is HALO. Virtually ANY other game that has ever appeared on an XBOX machine can also be found on a PC (including HALO), PS2, PS3, GameCube, Wii or WiiU. It's also going to be virtually identical to ports on the other platforms too. There's virtually nothing besides HALO to distinguish XBOX on the software front. That is really sad to me. There is a lot more potential here since Microsoft has more money than just about any corporation on Earth.

I played the first two HALO titles on the original XBOX. I have not played the other sequels since that time. Microsoft has been known to have a LOT of hardware problems with their 360 console and that turned me off. I'm not interested in the new XBOX ONE console, either. There are earlier entries over the last few months in this blog that explain why.

Without HALO, they would not have any real exclusives that could keep them profitable. That ain't good. In fact, the first console would not have existed if it hadn't been for Microsoft having billions of Dollars to throw at the product. If not for their money, I'd say Microsoft's position in gaming was the most tenuous of the current marketplace competitors. Thanks to that HUGE pocketbook though, 3rd party companies are still willing to take a chance. If all else fails, XBOX can always run home to Daddy for more cash. Draw what conclusions you will about that...

In conclusion, it's not necessarily impossible to have a successful (and even legendary) game console/portable without a good collection of 1st party franchises. Atari did that with the 2600 and (so far) no one else has pulled it off since. After all, did you see a lot of sequels to the home versions of their arcade hits? The only one I know of is Millipede, which was the sequel of Centipede. Not many people bought Millipede on the 2600, either. By the time that game made it to home consoles, the NES was available and the NES version sold better. I had it once.

However, having a strong 1st party line-up certainly does help. Thanks to Mario, Zelda, Metroid, F-Zero, the Wii series games, et al., I know what I'm getting when I buy Nintendo. I'm not always sure with everyone else. That ain't right. Why spend hundreds of Dollars on a Halo machine or the 'repository of 3rd party ventures' that is the PlayStation brand nowadays? That may very well be why the PS Vita has been a flop and why the PS3 has struggled its whole life. Oh well... Sucks to be them, I guess...

- Lord Publius

P.S. While this could very well be (mis)interpreted as me being a Nintendo fanboy in a lot of ways (which is quite true), I prefer  to think of it as taking the most objective look at the market that I possibly could. Either way, Nintendo gets 1st preference in the current console/portable market. PS4 & XBOX ONE also cost too damned much, anyway...

Fire Steve Ballmer and sell off the XBOX division?

I came across a short and sweet business article on a video game discussion board talking about a group of Microsoft investors (who own 1% of Microsoft stock) wanting Steve Ballmer fired and the XBOX Division sold off.

Seeing stories like this make me laugh. Even if it makes no money, the XBOX brand does attract a lot of favorable press/consumer attention to M$ most of the time so, it ain't going away. In fact, has M$ ever left a business once they muscled their way into that market? Their cell phone software was CRAP for many years but, now, it does increasingly better business for them. I still don't trust Windows Phone enough to even give it a chance, though.

In fact, I don't even own a smart phone.

I don't want one, either.

Yes, I am old-fashioned in that area.

No, I don't care about keeping up with the Jones's...

All that being said, I have no interest in the next XBOX console or even the current 360. Knowing M$, they will find a way to make this thing an unreliable pile of junk. It's amazing, really... The first XBOX was something they considered a failure in many ways yet, that's the one that I have in my collection and actually like... How did that happen? Better yet, I have NEVER had any trouble with that machine and have never heard of anyone else having trouble with it, either. Weird...

As for Steve Ballmer, I doubt he's going away, either. Bill Gates picked him to be his successor. Bill's place in Microsoft is just like Steve Jobs' place over at Apple, except without the Cult of Personality and Megalomania surrounding him. (Well, maybe a little Megalomania...) Ballmer will leave only when he's ready to leave.

If Microsoft wanted to worry about a truly bad product though, tell them to look at Windows 8. Not everyone has (or wants) a touchscreen PC yet, they made their core OS product heavily dependent on this still emerging technology. Why? Do they think they can force everyone to go out and buy a touchscreen device? If Apple couldn't make that cool for everyone with the iPod Touch and iPad, then how do they expect to succeed here? Appealing to the usual Microsoft customers at businesses may not work. Business people are not always imaginative and rarely embrace change.

Then again, I don't run a multi-trillion Dollar international technology conglomerate so, what do I know?

- Lord Publius

Also, made a few additions to my massive game collection today...

Atari 2600

Air-Sea Battle
Ice Hockey
Popeye

Atari 5200

Q*Bert
Popeye

Intellivision (INTV)

Burgertime
Stadium Mud Buggies

Colecovision (CVIS)

Decathalon

Super NES

Williams Arcade's Greatest Hits

SEGA Master System

Blade Eagle 3-D
Choplifter
Shanghai

SEGA Dreamcast

Worms World Party (Factory Sealed)

Taxing churches?!

Courtesy of a friend on Facebook, I came across this short (and poorly thought out) op-ed piece from Slate about taxing churches.

The author seems to think that churches should be taxed since they often feature clergy that speak out on political/cultural issues. This argument is a logical fallacy and what it suggests will never happen.

Churches aren't taxed for good reason. No taxes = more of the money they collect going to the poor. (Well, that's the theory, anyway...)

Despite my many misgivings about organized religions, some of them do manage to do a good job caring for the poor. Even when they mess up, they still do a FAR superior job of caring for society's disadvantaged than ANY government ever will. This is why they have always had a tax-exempt status in America. It was set up that way so they could continue doing what they existed to do: helping people so that Government wouldn't have to spend the Nation's money on innumerable social welfare programs.

The Founding Fathers were pretty damned smart about these kind of things. They were also quite literate in world history. They knew what happened to nations that spent their national budgets on too many social welfare programs. It devolves into little else than appeasing the populace. I just can't understand why Democrats can't read a few history books and figure this out too. Their own mistakes with the New Deal and the Great Society should have taught them those lessons pretty well. The New Deal made the Great Depression last even longer. It took a victory in a world war to pull us out. The 'Great Society' didn't really accomplish any of its goals, either. Racism still exists and might actually be on the increase because of that Trayvon Martin bullshit. Poverty still exists too... and it always will. There will always be people who are unlucky or just bad with money. That's why charities (including most churches themselves) exist.

Again, No taxes = more of the money they collect going to the poor.

Willfully repeating Emperor Constantine's actions with these glorified 'Bread and Circuses'-type actions does not help society in any way. If it contributed to the downfall of a mighty civilization like the Roman Empire then, what do you think will happen to us? Prosperity is created by developing NEW resources, not spreading the preexisting wealth around via taxation and Socialism.

Also, why should a church be singled out for a type of 'free speech tax' when numerous non-profit groups speak out on politics and social matters all the time? That's not fair. It's a Democrat deliberately trying to target a group that he doesn't like and wants to see suffer. While I'm not a fan of most churches and organized religions, I'm not going to target them with bogus laws, either. It's unfair and does not afford them the equal protection under the law that all groups and citizens are guaranteed by our Constitution. It's nothing more than misusing the Law to carry out a social vendetta. It's also quite unnecessary.

Various personal issues with organizations disgracing the Judeo-Christian tradition aside (*cough*Roman Catholicism*cough*), you shouldn't need punitive tax laws to destroy a crooked religion. For example, this bad op-ed piece mentioned the Church of Scientology by name. Replaying ANYTHING Tom Cruise has done in public these last 10 years is probably the best anti-Scientology propaganda that money can't buy. That should be all you'd have to do to make most religions look ridiculous: Show their congregations in a religious fervor. While idiots will still flock to them for various reasons (usually a need to feel like they belong to something greater than themselves), intelligent people will rightfully get creeped out and haul ass out of there.

In short, quit trying to take money that isn't yours to take and just laugh at these ass-clowns like the rest of the world's Free-thinkers. Your life will be a lot happier if you just learn to pick and choose your battles a little better.

No taxes = more of the money that churches collect going to the poor.

- Lord Publius

Goths make better lovers? I call Bullshit...

I'm sure most would think that someone who's been marginalized by society his entire life wouldn't make fun of other socially marginalized people but, you'd be wrong. I make fun of just about EVERYTHING in the world, including my fellow Freaks, Geeks and Ill-tempered Psychos. The difference however, is that I do it with Love and a purpose. It's not just to be an Asshole.

I don't know how but, I came across some weird 10-minute documentary about Goths being better lovers on YouTube earlier tonight. So, I gave it a view and decided to offer a brutally honest (and hopefully hilarious) retort.

FAIR WARNING: Some of what I write here may be offensive to thin-skinned individuals. It's not necessarily intended but, I don't care, either. Aspies don't have a brain/mouth filter (as virtually any friend or family member I've ever had can tell you) and I am a HUGE fan of free-expression. So, here we go...

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1.) I thought Goth was more of a fashion choice than anything else. Was I wrong?

2.) What kind of job opportunities do these people even have? I mean besides record stores, tattoo parlors, music bars/nightclubs and other places friendly to (for lack of better term) social misfits?...

3.) Black clothes, black boots, black hair, black lipstick and nail polish... liquid-paper white face. I'm sorry, didn't we use to call that 'Halloween?' - Bill Engvall (I kid, I kid!!!)

4.) Of course Goths stick together for a long time. It's hard to find someone who accepts a lover that is socially marginalized. Birds of a feather tend to flock together. (Ask me how I know. Go ahead. Ask me.)

5.) Goth males are in touch with their feminine side? Well, I guess that precludes me from EVER being one. I don't have a feminine side. Asperger's Syndrome tends to give you an overtly male mentality and thought process. I have even less of an idea of what kind of insanity runs through a woman's mind than any other guy on Earth does. That probably explains why I've never had much luck with the Womenfolk... Besides various communication problems that are rapidly dissipating...

6.) That 'male' at time index 3:25 strikes me as being much more than just 'in touch with his feminine side'... And yet, he probably gets a LOT of action from the opposite sex just because the Goth females don't consider him to be threatening at all. Yep... There is no understanding the craziness that runs through a woman's mind...

7.) As for female Goths... Well, I could see myself getting involved with one if the right one came along. However, she can't have 20 lip rings and several razor blades in her face. That just ain't right... Oh, and NO FAT CHICKS, DAMMIT!!!.

8.) This Goth girlfriend trying to drag me into the fray and becoming part of that sub-culture is also quite unlikely to happen. I may be an oddball but, no self-respecting Paisan is ever going to deliberately make himself look like a fanook. Black clothes certainly aren't a problem, though. I have plenty of those... [/Missing my leather jacket from High School right now]

9.) In what social group is it NOT cool to be intelligent? (Besides the Hoodrats in the ghetto who are 'keepin' it real' for some reason?)

10.) @ the guy and gal at time index 6:20: Oh, so you think you're more adventurous in bed, huh? I call Bullshit. I know plenty of seemingly normal (or at least, normal-looking) people whose escapades would put yours to shame, Mr. I-think-I'm-a-great-lover-because-I-fuck-while-listening-to-Type-O-Negative-records. :P

11.) BTW, Type O Negative kicks ass. I wanna fuck a broad while listening to the October Rust album on vinyl, especially the song Love You to Death. That could be pretty cool. :)

12.) The chick with the pigtails looks pretty good to me. I'd use them for handlebars... (At this point, it should be obvious that I'm just poking fun and being an Asshole for the sake of good nightclub-style comedy.)

13.) There's a guide out there on how to pick up a Goth chick? That deserves a quick Google search...

14.) Found two of them...

- http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/HowTo:Attract_Goth_Chicks

- http://www.wikihow.com/Attract-a-Goth-Girl

15.) And the first thing one of those guides mentions is appearance. Even with people marginalized by society (and probably quite happy that way), looks still matter. Imagine that...

16.) No dating agencies for Goths, huh? Sounds like an open market that can be exploited for profit. :)

17.) So, you Goth types are better lovers because you're less sexually-repressed? Again, knowing some of the FREAKS that I know, I have to call Bullshit. Besides, some people actually employ tact and DON'T discuss their private lives in public. You often never really know people as well as you think. I wouldn't be a bit surprised if some small town pastor in the Bible Belt has a secret sex dungeon in his basement. I just hope it's his wife he's torturing down there instead of a few kids from the Congregation...

18.) Still confused about what exactly constitutes a Goth? Let the comedy singer Voltaire explain it to you...

19.) And here's a video on what Goth is definitely not...

- Lord Publius

The AWESOMENESS of Cards against Humanity...

Some time ago (I believe it was last summer), a friend introduced me to 'A party game for horrible people' called 'Cards against Humanity.' Nothing I say can possibly do the game justice. So, instead of laughing myself into a coronary while trying to explain the game, I advise you to just read the Wikipedia page to get an idea of what it's all about...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cards_Against_Humanity

And the company website...

http://cardsagainsthumanity.com/

And where you can buy it all on Amazon...

http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=cards+against+humanity+game&tag=googhydr-20&index=aps&hvadid=20411159181&hvpos=1t1&hvexid=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=3563003461283119360&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=b&hvdev=c&ref=pd_sl_9hyppb73iu_b

This game takes Political Correctness, ass-rapes it to high Hell, then wipes its dick on PC's teddy bear. It's pretty fucked up... and hilarious. Every time I mention this game, I find other sick twisted bastards (who just a few moments ago seemed quite sane and rational) WHO express their love for THE GAME.

The expansion packs (which I have but have not used in play just yet), are (somehow) even worse. I haven't even looked through all the cards yet because I'm afraid of what they might say.

I just looked at the first answer card in the first expansion and it said 'A big black dick.'

Then, I looked at the first answer card in the second expansion and it said 'A bigger blacker dick.'

When I finally got the third expansion, I looked at the first answer card in the pack, dreading what it might say. However, it didn't say anything about big black dicks. However, this did NOT offer any relief. Instead, the card said 'The primal, ball-slapping sex your parents are having right now.' Yeah... Now I'm starting to wish it did actually say something about a big black dick instead...

I think this game is going to provide many years of demented enjoyment... As long as I have friends to play the game with...

That has been a problem as of late. Both of my neighbors have suddenly moved away. I can count the number of lower-enlisted people on this base that I could call a 'friend' on one hand. Regulations forbid socializing with NCO's under virtually any circumstances. I'm not entirely sure how I should go about socializing with civilians in the area, either.

I have been feeling a bit lonely too but, that is a topic for the next blog...

- Lord Publius

MORE ideas for new Star Trek TV shows...

This is a sequel to a previous post, which you can find here.

This post also requires some detailed knowledge of Star Trek's history, technology and lore. You have been warned.

Last night on Facebook, I saw an awesome picture of a newly refitted Constitution Class ship upgraded with late 24th Century technology. According to the picture's liner notes, it was a new Constitution subclass pressed into service during the Dominion War. It was called the 'Wyvern Project' after it's subclass prototype, USS Wyvern. I tracked the pic down to its original source on a DeviantArt page here.

Here's what the ship looks like, for those who are too lazy to follow a link to a DeviantArt page...

 

Starfleet needed ships really badly in the Dominion War so, they went looking through their mothball fleets. They found a bunch of old Constitution class ships that were well preserved so, they pressed them back into service with upgraded tech. All the other details that go along with the pic are on the DeviantArt page so, I won't repeat them here. However, I do like how this new refit has phaser arrays like later classes did from the Ambassador class on up instead of just a few fixed Phaser bank emplacements. The ship should have no trouble using modern Quantum torpedoes either since those weapons were designed to launch from a standard torpedo launcher. Standard Photon Torpedoes haven't changed much at all between the time of Kirk and Picard.

There are things about those nacelles I would change. Namely, the red would go away and it would stay black, like it was before. The new illuminated grilles on the nacelles that are glowing blue would illuminate the entire grill (including the section that's red in the picture), not just the sections that are illuminated in the picture. I'm still on the fence as to whether or not the nacelles should be constantly illuminated or only when the ship is at warp.

Anyway, when I saw this ship, I started getting ideas for new shows. 2 of them for this ship in particular and a third one for another ship...

Idea #1

Just like the idea in the last post, the Federation is still rebuilding from the Dominion conflict. They need as many ships out there as possible to help with these efforts and to 'wave the flag', so to speak. The difference here is that instead of a Galaxy class ship like I suggested before, we can use this new refit of the venerable (and legendary) Constitution class. There's bound to be a LOT of Federation citizens who would be happy to see one of those in their system. After all, the class was good enough to have TWO different ships named Enterprise in its numbers.

Idea #2

The ships were pressed into service during the war and served quite well. However, they were replaced with newer designs after the war because Starfleet didn't want to be relying on increasingly old technology in increasingly old hulls. Some of them were sold to private corporations and individuals. One such individual, who happens to be a former Starfleet officer/Dominion War veteran with connections, bought one for himself.

He becomes a cargo captain working for the old Earth Cargo Service, using this massive (for cargo ship standards) vessel to deliver cargo all over the Federation. He becomes well known among the cargo hauling community for getting things delivered on time (if not early) and for fighting off Orion Pirates with ease. After all, who's going to be able to stand up to a former Starfleet starship armed with modern weapons left over from the war?

There are numerous different story ideas that can be employed with that scenario. This ship could help Starfleet in a pinch in a dangerous sector of space. He could also be contracted by Starfleet to deliver cargo to a certain Starbase only to discover he's transporting something dangerous/illegal. (WMD's, alien tech, Borg drones in suspended animation, et al.) Or, maybe he works under cover for Starfleet helping them to bring down the Orion Syndicate and their bands of Space Pirates. The possibilites are endless and it really can be like a Western in space. :)

I have no idea what you'd name this Constitution-refit in either of these two show ideas but, it wouldn't be Wyvern. The name 'Star Trek: Wyvern' isn't all that marketable.

Idea #3

This idea is just the third variation on the same old 'proud flagship helping to rebuild and improve morale' idea that has already been expressed twice now. Yes, it's still the same basic idea, as always. However, it's with yet another ship whose name I love: USS Fearless. This is a ship that actually exists in the canon and has been (very briefly) seen on-screen in a first season episode of The Next Generation. It's an Excelsior class with the registry number NCC-14598. The name 'Star Trek: Fearless' sounds quite good to me.

It can even be written into the scripts/series bible/whatever that the Excelsior class design is now woefully obsolete but, Starfleet just can't afford to replace them yet. So, the ship is often out-gunned by enemy vessels. Despite this, the ship and her brave crew constantly live up to its name and triumph over adversity, making it the Starship equivalent of a living legend. I like the sound of that very much.

Anyway, here's what the ship would look like...

 

Now, if only a few producers from CBS/Paramount/Viacom would give me a call... Or, Pocketbooks. I don't mind turning these ideas into books instead. That's probably the only place we'll ever see the Prime Universe again anyway. The Abramsverse has become so financially successful that Paramount, et al. will probably never look back. Of course, that would mean that I'd have to find a way to use one of the characters that are already established in the canon. Pocketbooks wants a known character to help make the book easier to market to fans. Fortunately, that shouldn't present a problem.

- Lord Publius

So, I've been adding to my Atari collection a lot recently...

It all started a few months ago with me wandering into a local record store, only to discover that they sell a lot of old games too. I've collected quite a few prized items from them, including a SEGA Saturn and a NES Top-loader. I never thought I'd acquire those for my collection...

Anyway, I've managed to acquire 3 different Atari 2600 consoles since that time: 1 of the 'Darth Vader' model and 2 of the '2600jr.' model. (One of those Juniors came from a local pawn shop instead of the record store.)

The selection of games I have acquired (which now numbers in the dozens) is mostly the standard fare for Atari. However, there was one game that I wanted VERY badly and another I've always wanted to try. Somehow, I managed to find factory-sealed copies of these for next to nothing in cost on Amazon in the last few weeks. Awesome. :)

Okay, enough talk. Time for some pics of classic Atari 2600 gaming goodness... :)

You can see my entire 2600 game collection in the last pic. That pic was taken only minutes ago. There's a copy of River Raid and Othello with a rubber band around them both. That was done to remind me that neither of them work anymore. :( At least I can still use them for that clear acrylic art project I mentioned in a previous post.

You might notice a few unusual labels that are taped onto the cartridges with scotch tape. I made those in Photoshop for the cartridges that no longer had an end label. I still need to print out and tape the label for that 2nd copy of Defender...

Also, I left the price tag on the carts in the pictures because I wanted to keep a record of how dirt cheap these cartridges were when I acquired them. Somehow, I don't believe that record store really knows the values of these games. I won't look it up and tell them, either.

What's that you say? Why didn't Lord Publius do some kind of unboxing video/picture sets on those 2 boxed cartridges? Well... Actually, I did...

First, here's Battlezone...

And, here's the most recent addition, which came in today: Solaris...

Yes, I opened them. What's the point of having a game you can't play?

Wait! There's more!

I've managed to acquire some games and controllers for the Atari 5200 and 7800 platforms from that record store too. Unfortunately, I don't have those consoles yet. I might be able to get a 5200 in a week or so but, I won't say anything more about that until it actually happens. (And I certainly do hope that it does indeed happen.)

Anyway, here's the pics...

All of those 5200 game cartridges were 50 cents a piece. I'm not sure if they are worth more or not but, that does seem pretty damned low to me. The 7800 port of Dig Dug was only a Dollar. I had that game on my 7800 when I was a teenager. I already know it's an awesome port. Also, I really wish I didn't sell my Atari 7800 years ago when I was going broke and needed money. :(

However, I will get another 7800 one day... And a 5200... And a Colecovision and an Intellivision too. I swear it to the gaming gods!

- Lord Publius

Fan petitions to get games on to the WiiU...

There seems to be a petition for everything nowadays... including petitions to get certain games released on certain platforms in certain regions. (Ex. Japanese games ported to North American WiiU consoles.) Anyway, here's a list of different petitions I found on a Nintendo fan site...

http://nintendoenthusiast.com/14693/fan-movement-wii-u-petitions/

As for what I think of them...

- The F-Zero game on that list is interesting to me but, the rest are games I don't know or care about...

- I can see how Minecraft on the WiiU would work. I would be interested in trying that out. I haven't played the game before but, I hear lots of good things about it...

- I can also understand why Zelda fans would want a remake of Majora's Mask on 3DS or WiiU. Personally, I think I'd like to play the port of that game on the GameCube that I already have in my collection first. Then, we can talk about remakes.

What I want to know is...

1.) Why is there no petition to get a new Metroid game?

2.) Can we use these petitions to get a new Star Trek game that's worth playing for once?

Or...

3.) How about getting a LOT more old games for the WiiU's download services like the eShop? (And why doesn't Nintendo realize that this is a guaranteed moneymaker for them, especially with their incredible back-catalog of titles?)

Those 3 things would sell like hot cakes in January, especially item number 2. How often do you come across a game based on a popular Movie/TV franchise that's really worth a shit? That doesn't happen very often... Especially with Star Trek...

- Lord Publius

The 10 cannots...

The 10 Cannots

By William J. H. Boetcker
(wrongfully attributed to Abraham Lincoln)

1.) You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.

2.) You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.

3.) You cannot help the poor man by destroying the rich.

4.) You cannot further the brotherhood of Man by inciting class hatred.

5.) You cannot build character and courage by taking away Man's initiative and independence.

6.) You cannot help small men by tearing down big men.

7.) You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.

8.) You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than your income.

9.) You cannot establish security on borrowed money.

10.) You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they will not do for themselves.

And there's 10 good reasons why I refuse to vote for Democrats. Those 10 things are EXACTLY what they do. It's destructive to civilized society and *quite* Un-American.

- Lord Publius

Linux Rant for 11 Aug 2013

I learn more and more about this new OS every minute I play with it...

1.) Tomorrow's task will be to download/install a few games via the Software Manager (which is a great idea that Windows and MacOS should emulate for various things like Adobe Flash, Java, et al.) and then, Unreal Tournament 2004 from the original disc.

2.) I'm not sure how I'm going to do it since the instruction manual doesn't even mention Linux. Yet, the back of the box does. WTF? If nothing else, at least it will be a good test of the WINE emulator's abilities.

3.) After I figure all that out, I start research on how to use the terminal.

4.) At this rate, I'll probably be modifying the kernel, beta-testing, programming the A.I. & OS for the Starship Enterprise and pen-testing people's networks for fun in about 6 months. :P

- Lord Publius

Cheesy idea for a horror movie-themed Porno...

WARNING: This post is NOT for anyone who is extremely religious, sexually repressed or lacking in a sense of sardonic humor. You have been warned...

I have some really disturbed friends. This happens when you are always on the fringe of society. You tend to attract the other weirdos a LOT more than regular people. And I usually like it that way since regular people bore the snot out of me. Anyway, one friend in particular started talking about how she once used a Hotel room Bible for a sex toy. I'm sure that was done to spite the Catholic and Evangelical churches that she once belonged to but, either way, I found that to be hysterical.

It also gave me an idea for a way to use that Bible for a prop in a Horror Porno that DOESN'T involve something obvious like spanking... well, at least not at first.

There's two guys and one girl in this clip. (Since this fuck flick is horror-themed, we might as well go with a Devil's Three-way...)

The guys play the Priests and the girl is the poor individual possessed by 'Captain Howdy'. (Exorcist reference, FTW.) The Priests go through the whole 'Power of Christ compels you' spiel. The girl retorts with 'Your mother sucks cocks in Hell... and she taught me everything she knew!' From there, one's imagination should do the rest.

Also, if there must be a 'split-pea soup scene', just make the girl barf after being forced to do something particularly gross by one of the Priests. I won't speculate on what it might be here. However, since we have characters that are Catholic Priests, it should be something that will make the poor female cry. (And probably on camera...)

By the way, did I mention that I think Porn is pretty disgusting most of the time?

- Lord Publius

P.S. The female can NOT be a Redhead. After all, she's being possessed by the Devil. Why would the Devil waste time on someone who doesn't have a Soul? :P

It's been nearly a week since I last posted?

Time sure does fly when you're dealing with Sleep issues and acquiring new games for your Atari collection...

Speaking of which, I managed to find a copy of Battlezone (FINALLY!!!) on Amazon. It was complete in box, factory sealed, the only one left in the seller's inventory and only $7.99. Score! I've also got a copy of Solaris for the Atari 2600 on it's way here via Amazon too. I wonder if it will also be a brand new, untouched cartridge.

Anyway, there hasn't been anything else going on here. Just playing a few old games and watching Fringe on Blu-Ray. If anything interesting happens, I just might let you all know...

- Lord Publius

Retro Console Ideas...

Ever bought a clone console? I have. They can be very handy when your old system doesn't work anymore or just doesn't easily work on a new HDTV. (Especially if its only AV output is through an RF adapter...) I have one that emulates the NES, Super NES and SEGA Genesis called the Retron 3 and a portable Super NES called the SupaBoy, which also plugs into a TV via RCA composite cables. Other than wireless controllers that just don't work, I like the Retron 3 console. It allows me to play 3 of the consoles I grew up with without having to plug 3 separate consoles into the TV at once. (It has ports for the controllers of all three systems emulated, which saves the product's proverbial ass.) The SupaBoy is also nice as a Super NES replacement, if needed.

Some might also call the Atari Flashback series a type of clone console but, that's debatable with me. A clone console allows you to play your own cartridges on it with your own controllers. The first revision of Flashback 2 can be modded to play Atari 2600 cartridges and all Flashback models from 2-4 can use Atari 2600 peripherals. However, using a 3-button SEGA Genesis controller on them, like you can with an actual Atari 2600, does not work... Sadly... :(

Anyway, I think that there's a LOT more potential in clone consoles than what's been done so far. (i.e. ALWAYS cloning NES, Super NES & Genesis, probably because of licensing/copyright issues. The copyrights on those three are now public domain.) So, I came up with a few ideas of what I'd like to do with regards to clone consoles...

NOTE: ALL consoles will use regular composite RCA cables for A/V output. Regardless of whether it's playing Atari 2600 or N64 cartridges, providing S-Video/RGB/HDMI/Whatever would be extremely redundant and probably cost-prohibitive. Ideally, I want each console to sell for around $50. Also, can we make/market an actual arcade-style joystick to go along with these machines? They might prove to be a big hit. They will require different plugs on the end of the cables (or adapters) to plug into the right ports for the right classic system being emulated.

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Retro-8

- Clone console that plays games from 8-Bit home and portable systems to include: Atari 2600/7800, NES, Game Boy/Game Boy Color, SEGA Master System & SEGA Game Gear.

- Atari 5200, ColecoVision and Intellivision will be left out of this release because their controllers were too complex to emulate with our own designs (considering the target price range) and there just isn't enough demand for them in the retro market anymore.

- Should have 2 ports each for controllers from all systems. If possible, we will use the DB-9 ports for both the Atari & SEGA controllers since SEGA used Atari's technology/patents on the Master System/Genesis controllers.

- Provide at least 1 (if not 2) wired controllers that can be used on all games from the various systems being emulated here. The controller will look like a 6-button Genesis controller with 2 shoulder buttons, making it functional with Super NES games as well. The Atari 2600 games will have their action button responses mapped to just one of the buttons on the controllers included with the system. We might also make it possible for players to configure the controller set-up for different systems in a 'system menu' of some kind.

- Should we use wireless controllers? Not everyone who does that with clone consoles has had much luck with them with regard to their reliability... (See Retron 3)

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Retro-16/32 CD

- Another clone console like the Retro-8 but, this one plays cartridge and CD-based games from 16 and 32-Bit machines, including:

16-Bit: SEGA Genesis, Super NES, TG-16 & Atari Lynx. (Can we configure a port that will accept both Lynx and TG-16 cards?)

32-Bit: Game Boy Advance, SEGA Genesis 32X (should use the same port as 16-Bit Genesis games)

CD-Based: Sega CD, Sega Saturn, Sony PlayStation

- Will have 2 ports for SNES, Genesis/CD, Saturn and PS1 controllers.

- Will come with 2 wired controllers inspired by the PS1 design, including analog sticks.

- We might make the CD game functionality into it's own separate stand-alone machine to cut costs and give my company that's making these consoles another future product to sell. It would most likely be called the Retro-CD. It will have 2 wired controllers inspired by the PS1 design, including analog sticks. Naturally, there will also be ports for controllers from the SEGA CD/Saturn and PS1 as well.

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Retro-Nintendo or 'Nin-Retro' (Name needs work)

- Retro console that plays games from all of Nintendo's cartridge-based systems: NES, Super NES, N64, GameBoy/Color/Advance.

- Will have 2 controller ports for NES/Super NES and 4 for N64. NGB & GBC games will be played with either NES controllers and GBA games with Super NES controllers.

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- Retro Atari or 'Retro Fuji' ('Fuji' being a reference to the Atari logo, which is called the 'Atari Fuji')

- Retro console that plays games from all of Atari's cartridge-based systems: 2600, 5200, 7800 (should use same port as 2600 cartridges), Lynx and Jaguar.

- Will have DB-9 ports for 2600/7800 controllers.

- Will come with custom analog joystick controllers that will work for the 5200 and Jaguar games. Should look like a Jaguar controller with a N64-style analog stick in place of the D-Pad. This should make 1 controller design that can work for both Jaguar and 5200 games. It shouldn't be difficult to get them to work with 2600 & 7800 titles as well. (It's also virtually guaranteed to be more reliable than the joysticks that Atari made for the 5200 back in the day...)

- Can we make/market an actual arcade-style joystick to go along with this specific machine and compatible with ALL the systems being emulated here? It might be a big hit...

- As for Jaguar CD games... What few there are... How about emulating the best ones onto a custom made system-on-a-chip design inside the console? (Assuming there's a demand and we can get the license...)

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GAMES TO USE TO SHOW OFF THE ABILITIES OF THESE CONSOLES

The games used should always be the most graphically impressive games available (or just the most popular) for the consoles being emulated. They should also be something that easily accessible to all skill levels of all different gamers. A few different suggestions are as follows...

ATARI

Atari 2600

Asteroids
Battlzone
Bezerk
Buck Rogers: Planet of Zoom
Megamania
Ms. Pac-Man
Phoenix
Pitfall!
River Raid
Space Invaders
Star Trek: Strategic Operations Simulator

Atari 5200

Galaxian
Pole Position
Space Invaders
Star Trek: Strategic Operations Simulator
Super Breakout

Atari 7800

Alien Brigade
Asteroids
Centipede
Dig Dug
Galaga
Klax
Ms. Pac-Man
Planet Smashers
Pole Position II
Robotron: 2084
Xevious

Lynx

Blue Lightning
California Games
Chip's Challenge
KLAX
Ms. Pac-Man
Roadblasters
Warbirds

Jaguar

Alien vs. Predator
Atari Karts
Defender 2000
Doom
Iron Soldier
Missile Command 3D
Raiden
Tempest 2000
Wolfenstein 3D

NINTENDO

NES

Contra
Double Dragon 1 & 2
Kirby's Adventure
Mega Man series (That means 1-6 for those trying to keep track...)
Punch-Out!! (Preferably with Mike Tyson)
R.C. Pro-Am
Star Trek: The Next Generation
Super Mario Bros. 2 (USA version)
Super Mario Bros. 3
Tetris (Either the official Nintendo version or the Tengen version would be fine.)
Vindicators (Rare but cool Tengen game)

Super NES

Donkey Kong Country series
F-Zero
Mega Man X series
Mortal Kombat 2 & 3
Star Fox
Super Mario Kart
Super Mario World
Super Metroid

N64
Diddy Kong racing
F-Zero X
GoldenEye 007
Mario Kart 64
Perfect Dark
Super Mario 64
Super Smash Bros. (This one will attract large crowds...)

Game Boy

Mega Man series
Super Mario Land series
Tetris

Game Boy Color

Asteroids (1997 Remake)
Super Mario Bros. DX (Might be a risky proposition because of the screwball camera in that game...)
Tetris DX

Game Boy Advance

F-Zero: GP Legend
F-Zero: Maximum Velocity
Mario Kart: Super Circuit
Mario vs. Donkey Kong
Metroid Fusion
Metroid: Zero Mission
Super Mario Advance series

SEGA

Master System

After Burner
Alex Kidd series
Alien Syndrome
Sonic the Hedgehog series
Space Harrier 3-D

Game Gear

Columns series
Sonic the Hedgehog series

Genesis

Aladdin
Earthworm Jim
Eternal Champions
Castle of Illusion starring Mickey Mouse
Jurassic Park
Mortal Kombat series (especialy part 1)
NBA Jam
Sonic the Hedgehog series
Vector Man 1 & 2
Virtua Racing

Genesis 32X

Knuckles' Chaotix (Assuming you can't find another title from this ancient piece of shit console add-on...)
Space Harrier
Star Wars Arcade

SEGA CD

Sonic CD
The Terminator (I just LOVE the music in this game...)

Saturn

Alien Trilogy
Andretti Racing
Daytona USA
Doom
Hyper 3D Pinball
SEGA Rally Championship
Virtua Fighter series
Virtua Racing series

Sony PS1

Crash Bandicoot series
Gran Turismo series (assuming the in-game control is good...)
Tomb Raider series

- Lord Publius

DOOM for... the Commodore VIC-20?!

I know it sounds incredulous but, there really is a port of that classic game for that incredibly ancient, just barely 8-bit computer. Don't believe me? Here, take a look at the YouTube video of it that I just found...

I know this was just a geek exercise in programming or an ancient platform with a serious cult following but, I fail to see the point. How can you even make out what the various monsters are supposed to be? How can you even tell where you're going since everything is such a pixelated mess in a small window? Call me jaded if you want but, this project just seems like an unplayable waste of time to me.

- Lord Publius

P.S. The sound really sucked too.